Virtually Virtuous Vittles

Editors’ Note: VoxFairfax has previously reported upon esoteric food issues and conundrums. On December 5, 2018, we covered the Crudo Crunch and on December 30, 2018, we reported on the tipless Hershey’s kisses. We expect to return to this concern on an occasional basis.

Image result for uber eatsThe following headline appeared in a recent Apple News roundup of news stories:

NBC News

Will virtual restaurants make healthy food easier to buy or even harder?

The first question that came to mind was how unhealthy might virtual food be? By definition, virtual food connotes not quite the thing itself. And virtual restaurants being not quite traditional restaurants themselves, what food would they serve or deliver? This entire concept may draw fire from small-government conservatives who will object to the addition of increased government employment for virtual food inspectors. 

Ordering a virtual hamburger from a virtual restaurant poses a serious intellectual challenge, as well as an esthetic one. Virtual special sauce with virtual cheese and pickle slices? Hopefully, ATMs will be enabled to dispense crypto-currencies to pay for virtual food orders and delivery tips. How might a customer return an incorrect or unacceptable virtual food delivery?

More confounding is the suggestion that virtual healthy food from virtual restaurants might be even harder to obtain. Why cannot the customer simply imagine the most healthy virtual food conceivable and place the order? The helicopter generation will likely insist on a surcharge for unhealthy food such as sugared soft drinks.

Of course, the most significant conceptual stumbling block is how to consume and digest the virtual fare. Will hunger emerge after one hour? Dinner party orders might contribute to serious relationship dysfunction. The less fastidious among customers will appreciate diminishment of table- and dinnerware accoutrements. 

VoxFairfax invites its readers and visitors to submit personal experiences in this regard.

Categories: Issues, Local, National

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